I think one of the best things about children is that they are resilient. They always heal quick. They are fighters, not letting tiny things like us saying “No” stand in the way of anything that they do. They don’t let a scraped knee keep them from running around a playground. This resilience is what will help them overcome what’s going on in the world… but only if we teach them.
I see people upset about canceling trick or treating and Thanksgiving dinner, and potentially Christmas. Imagine the kids! But the thing is… kids will get over it if we teach them to. They aren’t going to be 40 years old and remember that one year that they didn’t have a birthday party or get to wear a costume and get free candy. They aren’t going to remember that one year that they didn’t go everywhere to eat food for the holidays. They will remember the pandemic, but they will remember how YOU taught them to handle it. Those experiences that you gave them in place of the ones that they would normally have. You could choose to mope about this crap… or you could teach your children to overcome it.
I choose to teach my kids new experiences to replace the old. I choose to not let things that I can’t control determine my happiness. If we can’t go out trick or treating, why not have an outdoor movie night by the illegal open fire in our backyard? They can run around with the dogs and glow sticks and enjoy the quiet night. Instead of a traditional Thanksgiving dinner where we go to 3 different houses or invite people over, why not do something fun like a traditional Korean “small plates” (banchan) dinner? I for one, am thankful to not have to slave over a Thanksgiving dinner or have to run around to 5 different places or even spend money on an overpriced Halloween costume. I’m choosing to teach my children to adapt, take things in stride, and find something good while everything else around them is blowing up into a huge pile of crap.
If we dwell on the things that we are missing out on, we are teaching our kids not to be resilient. We are teaching them that they have to be miserable rather than choosing to find the positive in any situation. If we teach them that they shouldn’t be resilient and adaptable, how will that affect them as adults? Well, I imagine you’ll teach children that they have to sit down and take it rather than make the best of a situation. They will tell their bosses “No, I don’t like this so I’m going to act like a brat about it”, then they get fired. Instead, when you teach them resilience, they won’t let things bother them. They’ll be less stressed. They’ll find the best in the situation and use that to overcome whatever challenges that they face.
… Or you could teach them that the world revolves around them and they shouldn’t adapt. Why should they adapt? They are used to one thing and that’s all they know and they shouldn’t change. Right? That’s something that makes a lot of sense and won’t contribute to raising another entitled generation….