Before kids, I hated going out and dealing with other people’s kids. I’ve considered even tripping the out of control brats running around while their parents either didn’t care enough to pay attention or even know where their kids were. Instead, I had enough self-control to just mutter “parents of the year” and accept that I would never have kids because based on these outings, I thought kids were more annoyance than they were worth. Then I had a kid and he wasn’t annoying. It wasn’t the child I had a problem with, it was the lack of parenting.
After all that I learned that those parents lacked one ability as a parent, and probably the most important: they didn’t know how to say “no”. “You want to run around the store and knocking things off the shelf and tripping other people in the store? Sure!” It’s easier to let your kids act like annoying brats and make yourself look like an ass than it is to use a simple word from the start. In raising my son, the word I put the most emphasis on was “no”. If he didn’t listen, I still remember the time out corner he sat in with his little Spider-Man chair. Taking him out was great, because I knew my son wasn’t going to act like a spoiled brat because I raised him to behave.
I don’t understand why at 18 I was able to do that successfully and how people twice my age couldn’t. I don’t understand now why I can walk through the store with my son and say “no” and have it be no big deal while another kid has an extreme full on melt down. It seems so simple just to teach them from the start how to behave properly, and going out into public makes me wonder if I have this all wrong. I think it would be easier to start from the minute the child understands what no means to say “no”, before they grow up to be tantrum monsters. I think there should be a public service announcement telling people to “not let other parents let their children be brats”.
I don’t feel guilty for rolling my eyes at people that make me sit back and wonder how that child is going to turn out. I don’t feel guilty judging them. They could have been trying to raise a kid with a person they might not agree their parenting. I know what that’s like, and you know what? My kid knows what no is and what it means. Being the good guy is training your children how to be good children. If I can do it at 18, I’m sure that others can do it at a later age. Parents need to just say no, it’ll be better for your child in the future and for your wallets now.