The Joys of Sickness and Feeling Fat

Sure, that title could easily describe me these days but I’m not the sick one I’m referring to. My darling husband, who is never sick, ends up with a nasty infection leaving him to stay in bed for 5 days of misery. He’s recovered nicely, and now I can get back to writing here. Yes, the flu is minor to him, he needed something more. It rattled him enough to want to get a flu shot next year, so I guess in retrospect I won.

During his sickness, it was either out of concern of me catching his illness or the fact that I’m in refusal of leaving the house, I was forced out with my lovely friend to attend a Jack and Jill. At first, no big deal it could be fun right? Only nothing fits me, nothing except this one pair of maternity pants that I had to buy for the fact that nothing fit me, and an ill-fitting shirt that made me look more fat than pregnant. I realized that in that moment of feeling disgust, that next time I hear a skinny non-pregnant person refer to herself as “fat”, I can’t guarantee I won’t punch her in the face. You don’t know the meaning of “feeling fat” until you’re pregnant. And I’m only 2 months in, I’m pretty sure I’m not going to last 9 months.

It was good to show up at the Jack and Jill though, it was like a mini middle/high school reunion. I remembered a few things though. Firstly, I remembered I hated high school. Secondly, I remembered I hated social events. I think I spent more time making fun of the band and how awful they were than I did actually doing anything else. In my defense though, I could play better music and I don’t know how to play an instrument. I hope that proves to you just how awful they were. Another sign? A band that plays… sorry, pretends to play rock music should not play a Lady GaGa song. It never ends well.

The moral of the story is the lesson I learned is that I shouldn’t leave the house under normal circumstances; I’m a bitter and sarcastic person with a distaste for other people. Being pregnant and not in the “glowing happy stages” of it, I probably should stay home because I’m a lot worse.

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