Tag Archives: Writing

by

Through the Weekend of Events

As the weather cools outside, I just want to cuddle up with a nice tea and focus on my writing. However, last time I attempted this my precious toddler nearly spilled it all over the place in a possible attempt to burn the both of us. Instead, I will drink this ice-cold water in an attempt to pretend it is anything but water. Now, to focus on a weekend of news and noteworthy mentions.

Ebola has still only killed one American on American soil. Until that number gets to at least 10, how about we cool the horses and stop the panic. Travel bans will not help, because we do not have authority over telling the countries that are actually suffering an outbreak to stop flights. Which means even if we stop flights to those places, people can still come in. Unless I’m missing something, which you can feel free to inform me of it. I like Shep Smith, and I have always stated my love for him. If you have not seen it where he said “if you’re concerned about getting sick and dying, get a flu shot because the flu has killed more people”, check it out immediately. He is 100% right, like most other situations. So news, stop spreading panic and focus on something that is actually beneficial to us.

Michelle Knight, who seems to be forever known as one of the girls that Ariel Castro kidnapped and repeatedly assaulted, seems to be getting some angry comments about forgiving her kidnapper and blaming his actions on a disease. While I do take some issue with allowing a person to let circumstances be a blame for their disgusting and appalling actions, hasn’t she been through enough? If she needs to forgive him to get closure and move on from the situation to go on and live a normal life, then don’t mock her for that. Some people need religion to make it through tough times, and no one blinks an eye. She mentions forgiving some now dead insignificant pile of dirt, and people are like “oh no, she crossed a line”. I actually admire her courage for coming out and speaking about those horrors. I admire her for being strong enough for forgiving someone who did such atrocious things to her and the others he had kidnapped. I wish I had that sort of enlightenment to forgive someone, because I’ve hated people for longer for obviously much less. Let her do what she needs to in order to move on with her life.

Elections are coming, so don’t forget to vote if that’s what you want to do. If not, don’t complain on the outcome. And try to remember not to be a jerk because someone disagrees with your politics. If you are, than you are the reason the political system is as awful as it is. If you do not bother to educate yourself on anything you are voting for, please don’t vote. You are probably the idiot that you are complaining about. Let’s talk about placing names on ballots without their political affiliation next to their names. If you go into the booth not knowing anything about any of the candidates, that’s kinda your fault and I hope that if you’re one of those people who only vote for one party, that you vote for the other on accident as a result. It’s your fault, and next time you should read something other than political propaganda sites. That “Obama Sucks” Facebook page you read doesn’t have the correct information on it anyways, and you’re an idiot for believing anything on there.

Finally, NaNoWriMo is starting very soon, and I’m very anxious for this. I have my story set and a few notations ready to go for starting. Ideally, I had wanted to start an outline which I think would have made this much easier than last year going in blind. Unfortunately with my freelancing duties in an attempt to earn money, has gotten in the way of that. Maybe I can get something quickly up by then. Probably not though. I can tell this one is going to be great, as my greatest cheerleader is actually very interested in the premise and story. He actually seems very excited to see what comes of it, and I this has helped me be more excited about it. I will unveil more details when November hits.

Thank you for visiting!

by

The Only Good News, Is No News

I was reading the news today, like most days. Top stories include catching the jackholes that did that god awful thing to that poor autistic kid during the ice bucket challenge. (Also, my post on the ice bucket challenge was proven true. People forgot all about that.) Then of course it wouldn’t be a news day without Ebola. Or shootings or other violence in public areas. Or other things that make you cringe and go “what the hell?” Let’s take a look at the top stories in news today.

 

To Abort or Not to Abort?: Last month, I was reading the monthly Cosmo. Yes, my guilty pleasure and judge me if you must. However, reading that magazine does not mean I have lower intelligence. It means that I acknowledge that sometimes you need to read mindless things to keep yourself from getting too serious. Not the point. I read a story about how this doctor was essentially sending his patients across the border into Mexico to buy “abortion drugs”. He couldn’t actually perform the abortion because of the new law that Texas had enacted, but he could fix the problem if someone took medicine to make sure it worked and was not a danger to the woman. I sat in awe. Seriously, we have amazing doctors here but we’re sending them across the border into cartel land to get a procedure that was allowed due to Roe v Wade? Why was this granted? So many women had died during botched self-procedures or shady doctors just trying to get a quick buck. Flash forward 41 years later, it seems to have reverted back. Until now, when the Supreme Court ruled 6-3 to block portions of this law. Am I pro-abortion? No, I don’t think anyone is pro-abortion. Am I pro-it’snoneofmydamnbusiness? Yes, I am. It’s the libertarian way of the government should stay out of person lives. That’s how it’s supposed to go, right? Or is it that the government needs to be small enough to fit in your bedroom? Either way, I’m glad that now the women can be safely treated for this procedure if it is their choice. I’ve been a teenager who was unexpectedly pregnant. I know what it’s like to weigh all options. It wasn’t the choice for me, nor will it be unless there is a serious medical problem. Unless you’ve been there, don’t presume to know what it’s like to be in their shoes.

 

Eeeeebola: Since March of this year, about 4600 people have contracted Ebola. Of those, around 52% of them died. These are stats that you can easily look up on the CDC website. Also according to the website, the only real confirmed cases in America were in Dallas. The person who died was from out of the country (my impression from the data on the site) and the recent patients that contracted it were healthcare workers that might have made “oopsies”. How is Ebola transmitted? I’m not going to have Ebola and breathe into the air and infect a whole movie theater of people, and then have my city shut down with military people barricading the place and risk possibly getting nuked. (God, I loved Outbreak.) It gets contracted by close contact with an infected person’s bodily fluids. Any other report is an embarrassment and a fear-mongering attempt that I just laugh at. I actually feel bad for the people who do not take the time to properly educate themselves. Let’s put this all into perspective. 92,000 people have died as a result of heart disease. 84,500 people have died as a result of cancer. Ebola? 1. Thanks to medical advances in America, we have death. So American news organizations, stop scaring everyone into thinking that everyone who sneezes next to you has Ebola. Report facts not scare tactics because facts save lives while scare tactics cause panic.

 

Sometimes Hitting Kids is Necessary: I wrote a hubpage on disciplining as a parent. I have expressed my displeasure that anyone who dares to spank their kid is an evil source. A person replied to me by informing me that I was wrong when I spanked my oldest child when he was younger and I had damaged him. There is a fine line between discipline and abuse it seems. If you’re quick to smack your kid over every little thing, yes that will absolutely cause significant damage to their mentality. Now, if you spank your kid twice in a span of 9 years that is not going to cause huge harm. They say “oh well that excuse of I was spanked and I turned out fine means nothing”. Let’s look at a fact here, because I love facts. When we were kids, would we have dared to fill a bucket of disgusting bodily fluids and film ourselves dumping it on a kid with autism? Heck no, our parents would have slapped us silly and locked us in a room without anything but staring at walls for months at a time if we dared. Today? I bet there are thousands more incidences just like that because no one wants to discipline their children. That’s why children are growing up to be crueler than ever. We were bullied as kids, but no one was ever bullied enough to cause someone to kill themselves. Even more, not enough to go to their wake and spit on their dead body. Maybe there is a correlation between discipline from younger generations to older ones and why there is such a rampant amount of adolescent misbehavior. Because, guess what? They grow up to be miscreant little shits and no one wants to take responsibility for that. If your kid is a little shit, look in the mirror because it’s your fault for allowing that behavior to get so bad that you lack any control of your children. You are not their friend; you are the person who is supposed to be molding model citizens with the capabilities of changing the world for the better. I keep thinking about if my son is autistic and this happened to him. Part of me would do unspeakable harm to them while the logical part of me realizes that little punks are worth the jail time. I hope they get the book thrown at them, because they are disgusting people. And then I want to know how their parents feel about it, because learned behavior does exist and I wonder how much they learned about teasing an autistic kid they learned from them.

 

Sorry for the length of the post, but it was all necessary to get it all out.

by

The Importance of an Education

Ever since I started to attend college, I knew that I wanted to go all the way with it. I wanted to be that ass that made people I didn’t like refer to me as Dr. LaRochelle, just because. That would be a half joke, I probably would pull that card out but probably only in jest. I wanted to do it because it would be awesome to be so accomplished that you could add a Ph.D to my name. I don’t mind hard work, and surprisingly I loved college. Someday, I keep saying. Someday.

First, I would have to manage my masters. Every now and then I think about it, then I start paying bills and realize I still (after about 6 or so years) owe around $30,000 in student loans from my B.A. Maybe now, as a homeowner in a single income family, I can get financial aid! I started to get excited at the possibility of finally getting there. I had the school in mind, Southern New Hampshire University (online of course). They are one of the only schools that I cam across that offers a master’s degree in Creative Writing. I did a FASFA calculator to see how much aid I qualify for. To my surprise, things like mortgages and single income families do not matter in assistance. Either way, my husband makes too much to qualify for anything like any other assistance. I sighed, and put the idea on the shelf. Maybe when my loans get paid off in another 40 years I can go. It makes sense though, what will a degree in creative writing even do? I might be able to get a job at a college to teach a bunch of kids about writing. I could waste my degree being a freelancer, as I do now, while trying to sell novels.

When I was younger, I was pushed into college by a loving man who I eventually ended up marrying. He reinforced what a huge influence on my in high school said to me. He said “you’re way to smart not to do it”. He was right. It became more than that. I looked at my then infant son and decided I didn’t need to do it for me. I knew I was intelligent. I needed to do this for him. I needed to show him just because I gave up college out of the circumstance of having him while in high school, does not mean I had to be another statistic. I wanted to show my son that you should just go and follow your dreams and get an education. Just because I was a mom did not mean I had to just give up and settle. Being a mom meant I shouldn’t settle because that was a lesson my child or future children would learn. Settling means accepting defeat or sitting on the couch on welfare just because you can. Settling means flipping burgers at a fast food place because it’s easy that way. I don’t settle.

The look of pride in everyone’s face that showed up when I walked was everything I needed to know that all the emotional struggle was worth it. And if I ever get the chance to get my masters? I will be incredibly proud because it would be such an accomplishment. I don’t need it though, because I have accomplished so much. I’m young and own my first house. I’m successful at being a mom. I do have a quasi-successful freelancing career. Hell, I have even sold a few of my eBooks. I have already done more than I would have if I never stepped foot into college to begin with. I can die and be OK with that. I’m not jealous of people with their master’s, because if they are willing to rub it in people’s faces then they don’t have the sort of happiness I do with my life. If I ever get it, I will be happy that I managed to do it while managing my life as a mom, wife, and writer. If not, I will just enjoy what I have because there’s no point in being sad because I have so much.

by

Then There is the Clean Up

All last week I crammed and crammed as much work in as possible. This was unbelievably stressful. The fact of the matter was we needed the money, and I tried my hardest to just get as many jobs in as possible. The inevitable happened when it all caught up to me. I was bound to fail, and I absolutely set myself up for it. In the field of freelancing, you get paid per job you finish. You don’t often get paid hourly, though I’m fortunate to have a few of those opportunities. For the most part, however, everything else is per accomplished piece. Just so there’s no misconceptions, the pay per job is generally very low. The average being about $2-$15 per job. So with the recent need I just accepted everything offered and worked like hell to get to everything while maintaining basic necessary things I have to do. Unfortunately that means I gave up my idea of doing my Halloween novel for this year. Maybe next year.

What did I fail? I had my first very unhappy client. This was worse because I gave him one awesome article and then proceeded to give him the worst article of my life. (To be clear, it was so bad in comparison that he suggested that I might have outsourced the job elsewhere.) I owned my mistake. I simply said it was rushed. That was partially true, I did rush it. I don’t even remember if I proofread it, and honestly I’m too ashamed to even look. I don’t give excuses, the fact of the matter is I failed and that’s really all that is important. All I got out of last week is a house I’m still trying to catch up with the cleaning. Moving forward from that, I haven’t completely learned my lesson. Trying to juggle everything at home with everything I need to do for my career is becoming increasingly tiring on me, physically and otherwise. It isn’t easy with 2 dogs and a toddler. I’m yelling more than I have ever yelled in my life, because I’m probably too stressed to deal with things that I normally was fine with. I don’t even really get any downtime to decompress, which is probably just a huge part of this snowball.

My house is a disaster, and it normally is at least pretty neat. That frustrates me because I don’t have as much time as I would like. My toddler is only getting more active and the dogs just get so wild. I end up having to stop everything to handle a tantrum or because my toddler decided to jump off the furniture and smack his chin so it has a really awesome bruise on it for when the developmental specialist comes by tomorrow. All this stuff with the specialists and the tests, the idea of how much this will cost isn’t helping my stress because my worrying about costs is making me hurry through everything. Hence, the bad article.

I had every intention of doing NaNoWriMo this year. Have? Had? I want to, because I know that if I dedicate myself to it I can easily win it again, and hopefully I can win one of the marketing packages for it so I can get a stepping stone into selling my 3 other e-books. (All available on the Kindle. There’s a link on the side that says “Buy My Work” that will lead you right there.) I know I have another good idea for the novel. I know that I have the talent. I just need time. Right now my option seems to be doing my work during the day, novel at night and sleep when I’m dead.

It would be easier if I just called it quits and went on to just raise the kids, clean the house, and do all the stuff a stay-at-home mom that doesn’t try to work from home does. Realistically, it’s not like I make a huge amount doing it anyways. I’ve never done the easy thing before, why would I start now? Things don’t just happen if you sit on your butt all day. Things require action, it requires you to go after what you want. If you expect things to change on a wish while eating junk food on the couch, then you don’t deserve my sympathy for nothing changing. It’s all about going out there and changing things for yourself.

by

Overcoming Life’s Circumstances and Autism Stigmas

Your circumstances are not meant to define you. This means that you shouldn’t allow them to. Circumstances, like people, change. They are meant to change. They are meant to be fought against so they don’t define you; so you define them. If you want to let them stay, is it because you’re not strong enough to change them or because you are already defeated and give up? I am not a victim. I am not someone who allows these things to define my life, but I concede that they have made me into a strong and unbeatable force to be reckoned with. As I should be. I don’t see my past as a definition; I see it as just something that I defeated to be a stronger person. And while these things didn’t define me, they gave me a backbone to stand tall with. Even when it hurts, I will still stand tall and nothing can change that.

There was an expectation that I would hear the words “your son might have Autism” that I would shut down and close my mind. There is such a stigma around that one simple word, that I was unaware even existed. I studied about it in school when I was heading towards my education degree, so maybe that skewed my thought process on the matter. Maybe I’m just a mom, which makes me willing to do anything to improve my son’s life. Maybe I’m just more rational than I give myself credit for. Or maybe I had to be the rock of the family while everyone gave their opinions about what comes next. The diagnosis doesn’t scare me: the cost of everything after does. My husband is guilty of over worrying and obsessing. While I would sit back and let the rain hit me if it will, my husband comes armed with a coat and an umbrella to control the outcome. I think this comes from the fact that I learned that sometimes you can’t control the outcome, you can just take it full force or you can hide in fear. I have always hated playing hide and seek anyways.

Likewise if it turns out my son is Autistic, then that’s the way it is. At least we know, we will be armed with the resources to help him in the best possible way. I’m warned by some people about how that label will follow him and define him and make people think less of my son. It’s their loss if they are going to be so closed-minded, because my boy is a silly and amazingly smart child. I understand Autism doesn’t mean my son is dumb. On the contrary, there are many brilliant Autistic kids out there. It’s a communication disorder, not a lack of intelligence. I understand that because I’m educated, and it’s about time other people educate themselves too.

I’m a mother that is on a quest to figure out what is going to help my son communicate with me. I’m frustrated when he cries and points while trying to tell me something that I don’t understand. I want to give him what he needs, and whatever I can do to make that possible is going to be done. My son might end up with a label but I will be damned if you think that gives you the right to judge him or ask me what I did wrong. I did everything right, and some people are just born with different problems. If they don’t harm people, what makes you sit on that high horse? If this happens, it’s not because I vaccinated my child. It’s not because I didn’t have an epidural. It’s not because I drank a coffee or Coke here or there while I was pregnant. It’s because he is supposed to be this way. I love him no matter what, and if you don’t that’s on you.

by

Sometimes Life is About Give and Take… But Mostly Give

In an age of starving artists, some turn to waiting tables or another job that is similar in order to pay the bills while they are waiting for their big break as actors or singers. They work long hours doing this, and spend whatever free time they have following their dreams and passions. That’s the reason that California and New York can have so many restaurants and have a constant flow of workers. Right? Artists turn their dream into creating logos for companies or cartoons for ads while they wait for their time to shine, if that time ever comes. Writers who dream of being best-selling novelists end up freelancing and letting other people benefit from their talent with words. In life, you give until you get an opportunity to take. I am waiting patiently for that opportunity.

My dream for having my Halloween novel being released in time for this Halloween is getting more impossible by day. With circumstances, I have to pick up more jobs freelancing to save up, because things like specialized hearing exams and neuropsych evals for toddlers does not come cheap. My comic was already put on hold during these circumstances. Something has to give, and sometimes those dreams are it. I can stay hopeful that maybe something will magically happen so I can get this novel out in a month. However, I’m not hopeful that this goal will happen. Maybe though, I can cross my fingers and go hard at it with some all-nighters. Then my responsibilities as a mother, wife and primary caretaker of the house kicks in. My household cannot afford me to be out of commission, as much as I would love to just shut myself off from everything for the next 2 months so I can get these novels done back to back as I originally planned. We’ll see how this works out. Everything works out the way it was intended… right?

Stars were meant to be chased after, not just simply watched. It’s not only a job for ourselves to continue to reach for them, it’s our jobs as parents to teach our child this lesson. If we don’t teach them to reach as high as possible, who will? The best way to do that is go just go for it, even if you are pulling at your hair wondering how you are going to accomplish everything. I’m awesome; I can do this. I have the strive and the will to do it, I just have to have the faith that it will work out.

by

Dear ScamPal… Err… PayPal

PayPal provides a service that promises easier handling of your money. We all like easy. We all love convenience. That is the staple of our current “immediate satisfaction” culture. We want everything at the tip of our fingers for easy access and ease of use. When a service promises quick and easy transfers of payments and allowing you to get paid quicker, we all jump at this opportunity to make our likes just a little bit easier. With our busy lives, this is something we look towards to make things go smoothly in a world where things often are difficult.

As a freelancer and someone who makes money from doing surveys and getting rebates from Ibotta (fantastic app, by the way. I get a guaranteed $0.25 every time I buy milk, which is a lot.) This means often getting payments through PayPal. I’ve never had a problem transferring money before until a few months ago. I tried to transfer $5 into my bank, and ended up accidentally removing $5 from it. While I swear up and down I didn’t do that, it was late at night and that mistake could have easily been made. I tried for a while after that to retrieve the $10 with no luck, doing the same steps I had previously. I gave up. Then, I get a payment of $50 in. Yes, now maybe I can get my money. Every 4 days for a month I tried to follow the same steps to get my money as I had in previous times when I had money transferred into my account. Still no luck. Finally I got pissed, and sent a polite email to PayPal so I can get my money. After sending an email saying “you didn’t do it right, I took care of it”, I was promised my money in 3-4 business days. Here I sit, 6 business days later and I still do not have my money. I replied to the original email of “you didn’t do it right, but I did” to tell them that maybe it wasn’t my fault the money didn’t transfer and that I would really love my money. No response as of yet about that.

We all know they make interest off our money. We have even heard horror stories of them “forgetting to transfer money” so they can keep getting the interest from our money. Since they are not a bank, they do not have the same rules and regulations that banks have. Translation: they are legally allowed to not give us money so they can continue making money off of it.

It might seem silly to some of you to get pissed about $60. My family lives paycheck to paycheck. That $60 could pay for diapers and wipes for my toddler. That $60 could be gas money for our car. That $60 could be the difference in being able to pay a bill or not. We’re fine when they screw with people who can afford to get screwed, but what about those of us who can’t?

I just want my money. I have found ways around using PayPal, and I look forward to closing my account with them for being thieves with terrible customer service. Do I want to wait for a check to be mailed to me up to 10 weeks after I earned the money? Not really, but I’ve waited almost that long now so why not? At least this way no one is ripping me off and being so nonchalant about it. This makes me cringe more every time that I hear “business are people too”. If I met a person like this in real life, I would probably punch them in the face and take the jail time proudly. Maybe we can get politicians to stop getting paid off by companies like this so the everyman can stop getting shafted “just because they can”. So thank you PayPal for making me see the light in how we sell our souls for convenience. Let’s start a petition to get regulations on business like this so these sort of instances can stop occurring. I know just from people I talk to daily that this happens all the time, and that doesn’t make it right. Let’s stand up and put a stop to having our money stolen from us because of loopholes that we can’t fight because we need the service.

by

Ending the Week With Controversy and Exciting News

Fall is coming, and this means the happiest time of year for me. I wonder if I could convince my husband to start setting up the Halloween decorations already? Too soon? He gets to put up stupid Christmas stuff over a month early, why can’t I get my Halloween stuff up early?! #debateoverholidays . It’s exciting to have our first holiday come up while we’re in our first house and I can’t wait to go completely overboard and be the neighborhood crazies. Which is horrible of me to say, considering one of the apartments next to me has mentally ill people. Besides the point, entirely.I promised both controversy and exciting news, and I will hopefully deliver on both.

I have written many blogs on how god awful it is to have Islam as a whole be accused of being a religion that celebrates terrorism because there are some radicals out there. I have even noted in the past that what makes those terrorists, but we ignore those radical Christian groups that bomb/shoot at abortion clinics. Why isn’t Christianity considered a terrorist religion because of those bad seeds but we automatically label all Muslims as terrorists. I even have recalled in the past how a person I grew up with (who was fantastic person) was Muslim and how she was treated after both terrorist attacks. More recently, people destroyed her family’s store after the Boston Marathon Bombing because her family has the nerve to not be Christian. I would even argue that even if they weren’t Muslim this would ‘ve happened because assholes in America only see skin color and clothes and not individual people.  So with that, I talk about ISIS.

People against calling them ISIS say it’s because they are neither a state nor part of Islam because they do not follow the teachings. While I agree it’s not a state, declaring them not Islamic is actually a half lie. They follow their own twisted ideals of the religion, as many twist Christians turn around the teachings of the bible to fit whatever endgame they have. Do I think they follow the teachings of the Qur’an as intended? Absolutely not. Despite what scaremongers want you to believe, they are a peaceful religion like any other peaceful religion. What do I think we should call them? I don’t care what you call them as long as you bomb the crap out of them and make them non-existent. In fact, how about we not refer to them as anything and not give them any airtime so they no longer get the toddler temper tantrum attention that they are getting. They are just children that want Mommy and Daddy’s attention, so give them the bomb treatment and call it a day? Not really because so many innocents are going to die. It’s not my place to decide which people die and who lives, unless it’s in a story I write. I just think this whole argument is stupid and distracts from the real issue of making them gone.

Now that the controversy is over, onto the good news. I have mentioned that I am going to join in another NaNoWriMo, hopefully with a completion like last year. I have the novel idea set, just need a title and to actually write it when November 1st hits. For now, I hopefully get my 4th e-book released in time for Halloween, a nice monster story for the masses to enjoy. Thank you as always for taking the time to read this.

by

A Random Hodge Podge of the World Around Us

I had every intention of posting on Monday, but the hearing test was more important and then I had the big clean up after that surprising success of a birthday party, our first at the house. I would have posted pictures, but it’s hard to post pictures while managing a party and chasing a toddler. Still, it was awesome to show off our accomplishments and feel good that we did a great job putting everything together. Although it was cramped because the weather did not cooperate at all.

So today I am talking about random things in the political and otherwise world, some relevant, some not. Let’s get started.

  • The Massachusetts Gubernatorial race: I’ve put a lot of thought into this race, as I normally have. I don’t like Coakley for the job. I liked her at her old job, but I don’t like the idea of her running our state. (Shocker, I’m registered to a party and I like to actually vote for candidates and not letters next to their names.) Baker, is probably the way I’m going to go. Why? Because he’s staying out of marriage equality and is pro-choice. And because he has a plan to reform the welfare system that I so often comment on. The fact that he’s reinstating the “work for it” policy, he automatically gets my vote. I don’t care if you need help, as long as you’re not sitting on your ass just expecting free money. Why should I have to work for my income and you don’t? I don’t want hand outs, I was raised to work for my keep. And I raise my children that way. So what makes them so special that they get every bit of help while someone who works their butt off all day doesn’t get a cent? The reason they have to make that choice is because too many people want to sit around all day and the ones who are really out there trying get shafted. Let’s help the ones who want to work out, and stop encouraging the ones who don’t. It’s a sickening system when it favors people who don’t want to work versus those who are doing everything they can to make ends meet. I have more respect for the person who flips burgers until they can find something else than I do someone who just doesn’t give a crap.
  • The Company’s Insurance Plan Covering Birth Control and “Abortion Drugs”: I’m not an expert on the legalities here, but I do wonder something: if the company does not want to pay for women to have access to these medicines that are so offensive to them, what do they think happens to their tax payer dollars when someone on state funded insurance plans cover it. Technically, their money is still going to the same “loathsome and offensive” medicines. Does that mean funding is going to be cut so no one provides these medicines to women? Or are they just going to find a loophole to stop paying taxes as a result? Also, scientifically speaking, Plan-B does not stop a pregnancy. It prevents the egg from dropping to make sure that a pregnancy never occurs. Just because you believe it is an abortion pill, doesn’t mean that it is. I’ve known some guys that believed they were God, doesn’t mean they were.
  • Protest Zones: With the buffer law being ruled as unconstitutional, I keep wondering if I’m allowed to protest wherever I want just because it’s my constitutional right. Can I protest on my church’s front steps, declaring that the spaghetti monster is the greatest God ever? I’m sure I’d probably be arrest with disturbing the peace or something. Or how about on the sidewalk outside of my neighbor’s apartments to complain about how awful they are at dog ownership? Can I do that? So why can the pro-life protesters block traffic with graphic signs and protest wherever they want. I’m afraid to go to my son’s specialist next month because it’s next to a clinic and I don’t want to deal with making the choice of running an idiot over because they think I want to abort my 2-year-old child. And I certainly do not want him subjected to some of those posters they have up. (Do they really need to get that graphic? I thought religious people had morals?) It’s not like the buffer zone was far away from the spot they wanted to protest, it just blocked them from protesting in the parking lot or blocking the entrances. I thought where one’s rights began another one’s ended? I should have become a lawyer.

That concludes the speech for today. Thank you for reading

by

The Art of the Sell Out

I remember when I wrote my first story in the 3rd grade. This assignment was supposed to be a one page historical fiction essay. I dreaded it. I loved to read and was never really asked to write anything, but I figured that I was smart enough and capable of doing it at least to a decent enough degree to get a good grade. I ended up writing a 6 paged short story as a result of getting so into it and was worried that my teacher was going to give me a lower grade as a result. Sure enough, she called me to her desk and applauded my work and gave me edits that needed to be done. After that, a few days later I sat nervously in the principal’s office. I didn’t really do anything wrong, but that doesn’t mean I could have been falsely accused. As it turns out, my story ended up on her desk so the school could praise my efforts. I was rewarded a certificate of being awesome, and a pencil with a “Principal’s Award” on it. It seems silly to look back at that now, but when you’re in the 3rd grade this really does have an impact on your life. From that moment on, I had wanted and dreamed of being a writer.

High school didn’t give me that sort of creative release and sometimes I look back and wonder that maybe if I had more of an opportunity to focus on that, I would have done a lot better in school. I did excel in the art classes, especially my clay sculpting class but it wasn’t enough. I knew I had skills for matching colors and it was effortless for me, but I loved writing more. I probably could have made more money going into interior design or some other art related field, but I went for love.

In college, I did very well. My first English professor made us do essays every few weeks and at some point it was a fictional essay. I had remembered this story that I had wanted to write, which lead to me applying to college in the first place. From there, I again took a one page assignment and tripled it. Again, there was a note on the paper when he returned it that said “see me after class” in large red letters. Again, I felt defeated and was glad that I was going into teaching instead of following my dreams of writing. I walked up to him after class, and he raved about how awesome this story was and where did it come from. The next semester I was waiting outside of the classroom for my new English professor when I saw my old and new professor walking together. My former professor said to my new one “watch out for that girl, she’s going to end up on the New York Times Best Sellers list”. Later the “new professor”, who I proceeded to have for the rest of my time at that school, wrote in my recommendation letter the same sentiment about how I had such a talent. My creative writing professor declared that some day she would be watching me read my novel aloud to eager listeners and how I bring the story alive when I do so. These people are the ones responsible for me throwing caution to the wind and going for it.

That said essay did end up being my NaNoWriMo book I released earlier this year though it was obviously completely reworked because I had lost the original piece. Years later, I have no made it big. I’m not on a best seller’s list. In fact, I have only sold 5 books. Maybe 6. I’ve decided to go into freelancing to help supplement this until I “make it big” or at least “big enough to pay bills”. Pretty much all the jobs have been awesome, but recently I picked up a job that makes me question the morality you sometimes are faced with on these sites. It seemed like an easy payday, and it really is. Give an honest review of a product. I can do that. And I did that, only to get a “I appreciate that review, but….” response back. They didn’t want my honest review, they wanted their honest review to hock a product. I gave myself a day to consider this, and then I saw bills piling up. I went against every fiber of my being and I feel guilty for it, and gave them the review they wanted. After I receive the payment for it, I will immediately end that contract because I’m not some pony that does tricks against my will. I know I’ll be faced with the same dilemma again, and unfortunately I will probably make the same decision again because the advantage is not in the freelancer’s court. We are pawns of a greater game where we sell words for menial profit just to make ends meet until our dreams are fulfilled. And those other people profit from our words, often times without us even getting credit. Which we generally don’t mind until something like this comes along and we’re stuck with “do we want to really lie about how great a product is for a retailer’s website?”

I sold out for $5. That’s all it took. Was $5, just enough to buy milk that my ravenous boys goes through so quickly. Am I giving up though? No, in fact today I’m hoping to start my next novel and hope I can release it for Halloween. And I will be participating in this years NaNoWriMo again, and hope for achieving it again. Hopefully with more breathing room than 5 hours before deadline. I can do this. I’m talented enough, and I’m focused enough to do this.