When it comes to a lot of things, I can be patient. What I can’t be patient about are things that are entirely out of my control. I want to, I really want to, be able to sit patiently without obsessively checking my email or asking my husband if he had heard anything new about the house or appraisal. But that isn’t me. I obsess, I want to grasp the ball back into my own court so I can at least be a part of the control. I’m not that lucky, and it’s entirely out of my hands. And this makes me nervous.
By Friday we should know something about the appraisal, if not about the whole answer of whether or not we were approved for the loan. At least my nerves are doing better knowing that someone else I know had the same deal with a cash gift and went through the same company as us and it worked out. That gives me some hope, but I’m still overly cautious because things have a way of just not working out for me. Sometimes I get lucky, but mostly it’s my stubborn determination and cursing a lot at fate that makes things fall into place. You just have a to try a few things and see what works, I suppose.
But for now, I just wait. I have enough to worry about with my son’s baseball and middle school orientation this week to occupy my mind, as well as catch up on some writing projects. I’m glad we’re doing this though. This has been difficult and trying for us as a family and we have yet to argue or yell at each other during this process, which allows us to see how strong of a couple we are. If we can make it through this journey without so much of a scratch, as we did with our baby’s surgery, everything else should be a cake walk. That’s what I keep telling myself anyways.